Mommy, what does "war" mean? What a challenge we face when our children ask about world conflict! We hope to shield them, but they hear the evening news. We hope to guard them but they hear things at school.

How does a parent teach a child about war? The question can only be answered on a age-appropriate level. Hopefully the ideas below can serve as starting points for your discussions with the children.

General Principles
1. Teach them to trust God for their safety. Read scriptures about God's care for His children. A family discussion of Psalm 3 will go far to help them trust God (challenge them to trust God like David did). Similar discussions of Psalm 23, John 14:1, Romans 8:28-39, etc. can give trust to a troubled heart. Read scripture daily! Pray diligently. Prayer itself works to disciple children into trusting God.

2. Face the hard reality that children, even in grade school years, must learn the sad fact of evil in the world. Preschoolers can usually be satisfied with short, easy answers like, "Some bad people are going to get a spanking." But grade school kids will need more explanation. They will know people are fighting and dying. Answer their questions clearly and honestly. Don't sweep tough realities under the rug. Kids 6 to 10 begin to understand those realities.

3. Focus on the importance of principles for which good men will die if necessary. Safety, protection of the innocent, protection of our shores, various freedoms and justice are all principles we choose to defend with our lives. Help them see that principles can transcend life itself.

4. Calm their fears. The news media (and school friends) often overstate the actual dangers. Threat level advisories are serious, but the individual child needs to hear mom or dad tell them that they are safe. Kids learn to fear what their parents or friends fear. Discuss with the family how to personally apply Matthew 10:28, "And do not fear those who kill the body, but are unable to kill the soul; but rather fear Him who is able to destroy both soul and body in hell."

Specific Suggestions
1. Help the children understand the difference between murder and just war. "Thou shalt not kill" in the King James translation (Exodus 20:13; Deuteronomy 5:13) should be translated "You shall not murder." Taking a guilty life to save the innocent from violence is God's will. To understand God's will they must understand that difference.

2. A local, personal illustration will often help children understand the difficult decision to pursue war. Compare international conflict to a personal conflict. Suppose a murderer is perched atop a high-rise office building. He is shooting one person per hour. A police sniper is atop an adjacent building and has a chance to stop the murderer by lethal force. Should the policeman shoot? If he does, has he acted responsibly? Should he be imprisoned or thanked? He should be thanked for the responsible saving of innocent lives. Applied to international aggression, if a war is for that purpose (saving innocent lives) then it may well be a just war.

3. Show the children that God's word does, indeed, have the answers to "... all things pertaining to life and Godliness," (II Peter 1:3). Read Deuteronomy 19 with the kids. There the Mosaic law discusses the problem of violence. Read with them from Luke 22:36-38 and explain that God allows the use of force to protect ourselves from violence. Explain that the same is true of international conflict.

4. Don't loose track of our true goal. Teach the children that the real goal is not merely earthly safety but eternal safety, life with Jesus Christ. Read Philippians 1:21-26. Remind them that even if our nation does become a dangerous place that we must learn to focus on our citizenship in heaven (Philippians 3:20).

5. Particularly during dangerous times, consider ending your prayers with the words of Psalm 3:5, "I will not be afraid of ten thousands of people Who have set themselves against me round about."

6. Show the children the difference between "safety" and "security." Safety is a tenuous balance of the physical that we don't always control. But security is a genuine state of being... being in a saved relationship with Jesus.

War need not destroy your children's faith or their trust. But they must understand that God is in control and that He is our strength and our trust. "Isaiah 12:2 still says "Behold, God is my salvation, I will trust and not be afraid; For the Lord God is my strength and song, And He has become my salvation."